Don't go to the grocery store hungry

DUH. We all know that. And yet we still go to the store with our well-planned list and a growly stomach. We buy everything on the list and a couple of Snickers bars for the ride home, plus who knows what else that might taste good if you haven't eaten in a week.



This noon, I went to the store to get something for lunch. I wanted veggies. I wanted something easy that I can microwave and eat. I wanted something that won't make me want a nap. And look: chicken tenders from the deli department, a "steamer" bag of rice with brocolli and carrot dust, AND a bag of dark chocolate & almond candy bars & a Snickers bar for the ride back to work. I suppose it could have been worse.



In other news... a while ago Annie asked me to write about my experiences with Eating the Angel Way so she can pull snippets for her book. I am working on it, trying to be brief, concise, and specific, and god forbid, organized.



What I have been thinking about is:

• how the eating a rainbow a day resonated with me. It is simple and elegant. And I do love colors. My mom often color coordinated meals. Even now I tend to serve orange and dark green veggies with curry. Maybe I need to be a little more daring.


• how after years of spiral dieting, I don't even say the word any more. I don't mean to criticize anyone else dieting, but when I hear the word I get hungry. And not hungry for tomatoes and cheese on wheat bread, but for a pint of Ben & Jerry's Karmel Sutra ice cream.


• how in the years of spiral dieting I lost weight but gained back twice as much. I started out as a "plump" girl and now I'm a fat old woman. I don't even think I was really plump. I had breasts at a fairly young age for back then, & so I was rounder than the skinny girls. What an idiot! Oh well, that's the past.


• how hard it is to find blue food. I keep finding more: blueberries, raddichio, purple cabbage, purple plums, eggplant...


• how I worried in the beginning that I was just checking off the rainbow without "getting" the angel way of eating. For one thing, I often eat a rainbow plus a chili cheese dog and fries. And I hear the demons whispering that anything called a "ho-ho" has to be good. But I think I am hearing something else more and more. My own angels, my heart, my sense of self. Something is leading me toward better choices for myself and not so I'll wow them at my 35th high school reunion. And something is helping me to forgive myself for the Snickers and the chili cheese dog.

For more about Eating the Angel Way from the person who listened to the angels and from her scientifically grounded research assistant, check out Eating...the angel way.

Intentions for a good week

After a fairly colorful weekend, I am about to go back to work after a week off. I'm thinking chocolate chip cookies, but no...

Yesterday I had almost two rainbows again, coming up short on the yellow & Biv and going strong with the green, orange, and red. I nibbled grapes, tomatoes, and carrots all day long. I had an omelet with tomatoes, carrots, squash, & zucchini for breakfast and a salad with every color except yellow with supper.

Eating at work is easier for me than for some people, since I have a kitchen. I'll take the leftover veggies, rice, and tzatziki sauce and some of the salad for lunch. I don't want to be tempted to run to Hardee's for a little thickburger that will make me a little thick worker.

My intentions for this week are to eat at least one rainbow a day and choose food that makes me feel energized and not run down. I intend to eat local as much as possible and to eat fresh, even if I have to cook. I will move every day... walking, heavy cleaning, dancing, or chasing Gabe. Something.

One step forward, two steps back

Yesterday, I started the day with a rainbow: cottage cheese with red strawberry, orange nectarine, yellow banana, green grapes, and purple plum. It was delicious and kept me happy for most of the day.

I had bits of fruit and veggies through out the day. If I keep them ready and on the top shelf of the refrigerator, I eat them.

For dinner I had chicken with tzatziki sauce, modified from a recipe I got at Cinnamon, Spice, & Everything Nice. Since I didn't want to go shopping again, I served it over rice instead of in a pita. And I broiled it in the oven, along with squash. The sauce is great, and is now my official salad dressing. It has cucumbers and Greek yogurt, so my dressing has protein. YAY! The salad was grape tomatoes, shredded carrots, romaine lettuce, green pepper, cucumber, radicchio. (Yellow from squash --- another rainbow plus lots of green.)

I fixed my plate and ate half of it. I was feeling smug right up to the point I took a box of cookies to bed with me. Don't ask me what that's about. I haven't figured it out yet.

I have to remember that it's not just eating a rainbow. That's step one. I also have to choose good protein and not choose the crappy brown stuff. I mean, the cookies weren't even homemade. What happened to don't eat anything that doesn't taste really good?

Oh Well.

Today I try again, and it should be easier since I finished the cookies and the ice cream. (Forgot to mention the ice cream.) I may walk a little this morning. It's only about 95 now. Moving on... moving on...

Eureka

Although my husband still makes fun of eating the angel way, offering me Skittles and going into what he thinks are extremely amusing monologues about chicken being white and beef being red, he is caught.

"Here, eat this, it's blue," he'll say, passing me some radicchio from his salad.

"What color are the garbanzo beans?"

"Did you see the orange carrots?"

My whole family is now searching for colorful fruits and veggies to fill out my plate, and in the process, their own.

Bob has come a long way from the day he poked around a cheese & pasta dish I'd made searching for the meat. He will eat almost anything once. As he got older and since he quit smoking, he can't eat an entire fried chicken by himself. He wants lean meat, fresh veggies, and as little bread as possible. He no longer rebels at the sight of whole wheat pasta or brown rice, as long as it's suffocated by good low-fat (not no-fat) sauces, spices, and herbs.

I cannot stand to have people watching what I eat, but there is nothing better than having a partner in health.

Funeral food

Last night, we went to a funeral and to the supper afterward. The supper was put together by church ladies, and I must say, I love me some church-lady food.

As Bob and I sat down with our groaning plates, Bob grinned at me and said, "Did you see any blue food?" I said, no, but I think I got some of everything else. I realized later that there was no orange food either (unless there were shredded carrots in the chicken casserole).

There was plenty of green --- zucchini, cucumbers, broccoli, green beans, black eyed peas with asparagus --- for the heart. Some of the prettiest red tomatoes, home grown with care. But mostly, yellow food.

They had a whole lot of yellow food. Is it the time of year, or do yellow foods comfort people in time of sorrow?

Sweet corn, squash casserole, squash with zucchini & tomatoes in a vinegar dressing, pineapple congealed salad. I don't usually eat congealed salads, but the lady who made it was standing there, so I had some. It was delicious! I think it had whipped topping stirred in it. I didn't even look at the cakes after this wonderful dessert/salad!

There is something special about funeral food. Cooked by ladies in the church or friends of the family, it is made with the intention of love and comfort for people they don't necessarily know. Whether it is the fried chicken or the rice and sausage or the zucchini/squash/tomato/cucumber salad, it is truly food from the angels. How can it be anything else when it's prepared with so much kindness?

Progress

I'm getting a handle on the to-do list and I haven't had a blow-out since Sunday night. Well, not a big one. I accidentally left the air-conditioner on all night at work, so it's actually cool enough for me. Oops.

Today, so far, I've had strawberries and peaches with cottage cheese, coffee; a redo of the sandwich from yesterday with the hummus and carrots on the side instead of in the sandwich. That's three red, two orange, and a green (I think --- from the hummus.) Lots of good protein.

And now I face the afternoon without that bloated need-a-nap feeling lunch often gives me. Wish me luck. I may even take a walk. Or not.

Comfort food

I am sort of stressing right now. There are a lot of things, many of which aren't really about me. I'm one of those people who stresses more if it isn't really my problem and I can't do anything to fix it. Give me a real crisis and I will be calm and efficient until it's over. Then I'll fall apart.

One of the things that's making me crazy and making it harder for me to cope is that I'm having hot freaking flashes all the damn time. I know, how can you tell in South Carolina in June? I can tell, and so will my husband when he sees the $500 electric bill. (I hope I'm kidding. But let me just turn up the air conditioner.)

So what does this have to do with my eating and exercising? Oh be real. Who eats a nice fresh salad with lots of pretty vegetables and a yogurt-cucumber dressing when she talks to her children about their life plans or lack thereof? Will a rice pilaf really help a daughter-in-law cope with the grief of losing her father? Can I worry about my total lack of money while eating dried rainbow muesli on yogurt?

Well, now that I put it that way, those things sound kind of yummy. But when I'm at work trying to finish up everything plus the three emergencies so that I can get out of town on Thursday afternoon, I don't think salad. I think bread. And cheese. And meat. And sugar.

I have heard from sources I trust that sometimes we need the comfort food to get us through the day or week or month. As one brilliant woman said, "you need the padding," to protect you from trauma.

For me, comfort food involves what Annie & the angels call brown food. Macaroni and cheese casserole (the kind with eggs and maybe bread crumbs.) Grilled cheese sandwiches. Ice cream and cookies. I think that comfort food in ingrained in your culture and your childhood. It's not necessarily what your mom or dad made (because my mom never made the mac and cheese with eggs), but it's what your mind thinks makes you feel better.

And so, in furthering my efforts to eat like an angel, I am not giving up comfort food. I am not kicking myself for bad choices. However, I am trying to make less bad choices that still meet the need of the small child who wants to get under a blanket and eat M&M's all day. It's not as hard as I thought it would be.

Today, I picked up bread and cheese (a whole wheat nan & sliced Havarti). Then I added a SC tomato that should have been eaten over the sink, some roast beef, horse radish sauce, and a weird southwestern vegetable hummus I found. That was a mess of a sandwich, and it made me feel really good. Full in body and spirit. As an added bonus, I didn't feel the need to shower in Dawn afterwards. I was able to work all afternoon without needing a nap.

This is my intention: when I want comfort, I'll think of the easy lunch I had today.

And, now, I think I'll look up some rice pilaf recipes. Rice is a comfort food....

To eat a peach

When T. S. Eliot wondered if he dare to eat a peach, he did not live in SC and it was not June. I know this because, no matter how off your digestive system is, a fully ripe SC peach is worth it.

To enjoy a fully ripe SC peach is a full-sensory experience.

It starts with the color of the peach: creamy yellow to dark orangy-red with what the fashion industry calls peach in the middle. The peach is not a ball; it is off-center, with a ridge along the edge and a pointy end that is almost erotic. Well, Georgia O'Keeffe should have painted peaches.. that's all I'm saying.

And then, you pick it up and feel the soft, slightly fuzzy skin. It's fuzzy like soft velvet, not like bunny slippers. It's soft but firm --- if it's soft and mushy, make ice cream. It will still be good.

Next, put the peach to your nose and inhale gently. If you think you might faint from the joy of it, it's ready to eat. Although I've never been asked to leave the produce department while choosing peaches, I have gotten some looks. And more than one person has said, "I'll have what she's having."

It is now time to eat the peach. You can cut it up, mix it with other fruit, make peach cobbler or peach pie or peach ice cream.

Or you can stand over the sink (this is important) and bite into it. The soft inner fruit melt into your mouth in shades of yellow, orange and red. The sweetness explodes, the juices flow, the world is a better place.

Rinse, repeat, until you understand what T. S. Eliot was worried about, but you think, "Man, that was worth it."

June Rainbow Challenge

Annie has issued a challenge for June:

June Rainbow Challenge how many can YOU eat? here in the northern hemisphere, summer's bounty is beginning. the Angels suggest (and i challenge) everyone to see how many complete rainbows (at least one serving each of a red, orange, yellow, green and blue/purple food) we can all eat in a day. the most i've ever done managed is three - and that includes herbs, spices and teas. send me a note or drop me a comment and let me know you want to play. then, just keep track of how many rainbows you're eating. at the end of the month, the person with the most rainbows will win an Angel-approved prize! happy eating!

I have spent the first week of June at the beach in Hilton Head, SC. Although I have eaten lots and lots of fruit and even a couple of veggies, I didn't really keep track for the first couple of days. And with the challenge of feeding a condo full of people with divergent tastes (10 including two babies), I haven't been able to eat my favorites. It's one thing to fix my husband and two at home sons steamed squash, zucchini, carrots, & onions every other day, but when we add my Dad, niece, other son & daughter-in-law --- well, what can I say? And I didn't want to try to cook too much this vacation.

Toward that goal, we loaded up on fruits which we set out on the counter. Of course we had Romaine lettuce and tomato for the deli sandwiches. We added a little corn on the cob, green beans, new potatoes, and broccoli. I guess it wasn't a complete desert.

And no one can complain about the activity and communing with nature. The kids went from the pool to the beach and back all day long. Bob and I enjoyed a couple of long walks on the beach, with and without the children. I built two sand castles. They weren't record setters, but the were there.

So for this whole week, I think I've had six rainbows. They were mostly fruit, but who's complaining?